So what to do with people like this? Let them rant. When they take a breath, repeat back what they said in your own words. Any counselor will tell you that repetitively explaining anger dispels it. You don’t have to fix anything. You don’t have to make any promises you don’t intend to keep.
The important thing is the angry person thinks,
“Finally, I found someone who will listen.” It isn’t easy.
How to Deal With Angry People by David Haynes April 12, 2012
A few days ago, I was instant
messaging with my daughter, Stacey, and I mentioned that I have started reading
Living Buddha, Living Christ, by Thich Nhat Hanh, a Vietnamese Buddhist monk,
teacher, author, poet and peace activist who now lives in France where he
was in exile for many years. Stacey expressed some curiosity about the book,
and shared that recently she had been involved with some discussion with the
youth group at her church about whether Jesus is the only way to experience
salvation. She said her response was that is what the church teaches.
Recognizing
that AIM might not be the best platform for the topic, I also
admitted to feeling some stress in the exchange, as though she might not really
want to know what I thought (or what Thich Nhat Hanh thought). As I reflect on
that conversation now, I regret that I was not able to just listen to her with my whole heart. The fact
that I was triggered by the exchange, even slightly, probably comes from my own
wrestling with the demons of what the church teaches and how that differs from what my heart feels.
It
has been sixteen years since I was formally part of the Christian church. It
has seemed like a lifetime for me to get even a whiff of peace around that.
Thankfully, like the song bird outside my window who feels the dawn and begins to sing while it is yet
dark, peace is finding me.
While
I was staying on Pine Island, I had a couple of very significant encounters
with the Living Christ. Perhaps the sharing of those will find their way into
another post. A few days later, as I was waking up one morning, I had the
clarity of Jesus as Teacher. What is appropriate relationship to/with a
teacher? Love a teacher? Yes! Follow a teacher? Yes! Respect a teacher? Yes?
Worship a teacher? No! I remembered my dad saying, "There is only one God
Almighty." I remembered the scripture telling of the importance of worshiping no other gods.
 |
| Photo of Jesus taken at Unity of Fort Myers, Florida. March 2012. |
Surely it is by grace that this book is speaking to my heart and mind and soul. "For
dialogue to be fruitful, we need to live deeply our own tradition, and, at the
same time, listen deeply to others. Through the practice of deep looking and
deep listening, we become free, able to see the beauty and values in our own and others' tradition." (p. 6)
It is
no wonder that I am very much enjoying Living
Buddha, Living Christ. I have discovered that in my heart I am Buddhist!
Some of you know of my trip to Thailand and my time at Veranda High Resort in
Chiang Mai, in Northern Thailand. My sister, Janis, told me she could sense
life returning to my dry bones while I was there. Hearing the monks chanting,
smelling the incense, and being in a culture for whom meditation is natural
were each new life to me.
 | |
| Photo of Buddha taken at temple in Chiang Mai, Thailand. September 2010. |
Forgive
me, Stacey. I love you and I love Jesus. I also love Buddha! For now, even though my altar is not in France, I will let these
words of Thich Nhat Hanh speak what is true for me:
On the altar in my hermitage in France are
images of Buddha and Jesus,
and every time I light incense,
I touch both of them as my spiritual
ancestors.
