This past weekend I was fortunate to attend a fall
meditation retreat at the Howell Nature Center. To allow us to enjoy being in a
more timeless place than is practical in our everyday lives, bells are rung for
“wake-up” and at mealtimes, and five minutes before group gatherings. Since I
am an early-morning riser, and not everyone is, I signed up for ringing the
wake-up bell at 5:55 a.m. on both Saturday and Sunday.
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I got dressed, and after walking slowly throughout the
lodge softly ringing the bell, I had time for a walk out in pre-dawn quiet. The
first morning, moments after stepping out-of-doors, I was thrilled to hear owl!
I could tell it was not far from where I was, and I stood very still for a few
moments just listening. This was especially tender as I have so recently
enjoyed reading the story of Wesley the
Owl. (see the previous blog post)
This retreat was my second with the Deep Spring Meditation Center group, and this time change happened. We had
an opportunity to meet with the instructors, and to ask questions about our meditation
practice. People asked about seeing colors or having body sensations (such as
tingling along the spine), or perhaps hearing music or sensing a presence.
I asked for help with a frustrating habit of mind
(counting) during my walking meditation. I was given a very simple suggestion
to use a rotating focus during my meditation. Begin paying attention to what
you are hearing, and make a mental note of “hearing.” Then shift your attention
to your posture—sitting or standing or walking, and make a mental note of “sitting.”
The next focus would be on “touching.” I noticed my hands on my lap or my feet
on the ground, or the hair against my forehead. Next, the focus would be on the
breath, with the mental note of “breathing.”
This allows you to observe not only what has your primary focus, but it also allows you
to become aware of the predominant
focus. As I had noticed when I was doing walking meditation, my predominant
focus was on that inner voice which kept counting. The teaching of this
particular form of meditation (Vipassana or Insight or Mindfulness) is to allow
what is in your awareness, not to try to resist it, but to just lovingly acknowledge
it. This reminds me of a young child who was insistent on getting your
attention. Ignoring him or her only generates more insistence!
The suggestion I was given was to simply notice the
counting and say to myself, “Breathing in I am aware of counting. Breathing out
I smile to counting.” Now, mind you, I
had been struggling with this habit of mind for years. One time doing this
gentle act of awareness, the counting stopped. What a welcome change....
Oh, the owl that I so enjoyed hearing was one of several
who are part of the Wild Wonders Wildlife Park at the nature center. The Howell
Conference & Nature Center has been caring for wild birds and mammals since
1982.
You can use this process with emotions like fear, anger, frustration, or with behaviors like judging, criticizing, worrying. You can
do it with basic mind habits like thinking,
remembering, planning The next time
you become aware of an unhelpful habit of mind or body, prove to yourself it works. “Breathing
in I am aware of_____. Breathing out I smile to_____.”
The welcome change is something worth being grateful for.
