Understanding our feelings is a lot like trying to change
the diaper of a wiggling toddler. As soon as you think you have a leg up on it,
something unexpected erupts. I have appreciated some of the writings about all
this that have come into my awareness of late. On December 4, 1993, when I
wrote this poem, I thought I was writing it for my sister, Janis. Today, I know
it was as much for me and for you, too.
The Magic Sack
God has
a gift for you...It is a magic sack.
It is
tailor made, and fits upon your back.
It is
filled with happy, mad and sad. All your
feelings; good or bad.
There
is room for every feeling here, as long as it's your own.
Its not
too heavy or too light, God made it so it fits just right.
Now
comes the part to ease your heart, though
difficult to bear.
YOU may
not carry another's sack, it is their own to wear.
For
each child upon this earth, God made and loves for all life's worth.
And
each and every one, you see, mother, sister, and even me,
Has
their very own magic sack tailor made to
fit their back!!!
In times of less awareness, we may expect or even
demand that others take on our emotions. According to Mark Nepo, in The Book of Awakening, this was because
we wouldn’t “take the risk to ask them to hold us while we are hurting.”
Fortunately, you can learn to be present to your own emotions. And
it is never too late to have a happy childhood. Nepo says it best: “If you think you have given
them what’s yours to carry, go to them and thank them for holding your sadness
and then lift it off their hearts and take it back. Ask them to hold you
instead.”
I am profoundly grateful to those who have been willing
to hold me rather than taking on my feelings. I have been held with respect and compassion and tenderness, and that has taught me to hold myself.
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| St. Jude Trail on Pine Island |
From today's Daily OM: When we simply allow ourselves
to fully feel our feelings as they come, we tend to let them go easily. This is
all we are required to do; our feelings simply want to be felt.
